Tuesday, January 29, 2008

fierce creatures

The lion padded swiftly towards us. I tried to move away steadily, without running. I herded the children in front of me, urging them on with low, insistent words. My daughter was in front and reached the door of the hut first. She darted inside, and I reached for Ben's hand to pull him inside, too.

The lion snarled and pounced. He seized my son betweeen his jaws; caught my son by the back of the neck as if Ben was an errant lion cub. The beast lifted my son in the air and I watched with a sense of hopelessness, and with a feeling of unbearable loss. In that moment, I felt a chasm of grief open up and I peered down into its depths with mounting horror.

And then I attacked the lion. I yelled, I howled, my rage knew no bounds. I grabbed my son with one arm, and began punching the lion's chest with my free hand. Sounds of such great fury came from my mouth that even I was astonished. There was a brief tug-of-war, and then all at once it was over. The lion released my son, and gave its head a shake, almost as if in disgust. The lion looked at me for a moment. His eyes seemed to convey that he could have taken my son; that this victory was only mine because he'd chosen to allow it.

***********************************************************************************
This was my dream, the night before Ben starts school (today). Do you think I might be feeling a wee bit protective of him?!!

21 comments:

Sandy said...

Just as soon as I finished the first paragraph I knew this must be a dream that you just had regarding Ben going off to school. It's not easy letting your baby go out into this fierce world even if it's only to school.
It's like a jungle out there, but he'll be okay.

Redneck Mommy said...

Ben will be fine.

But I'm kinda worried about you, darlin! LOL.

freefalling said...

Oh lordy, lordy - I can't believe it!
I woke up this morning and told Vince about the awful dream I had last night of lions and tigers ripping people apart!
Oh god and I haven't even got a baby yet.
I must have been dreaming for all those mums out there sending their babies off to school for the first time.
Seriously weird!

So, he must be home by now.
How did he (and you!) go?

jellyhead said...

Thanks Sandy for the words of wisdom and kindness :)

Redneck Mommy, don't worry abut me, I'm perfectly sane (rolling eyes whilst making strange gargling noises)

freefalling, I can't believe you dreamt of lions and tigers last night, too! And it all went pretty well, thanks for asking!... Ben got very slightly teary-eyed after I left (apparently), but was otherwise fine. I, cold-hearted cow that I am, went and ate a large second breakfast at a cafe with a friend! I felt concerned for Ben but knew there was nothing more I could do. I didn't need even one tissue.

thisisme said...

I had a feeling that was your dream about sending Ben to school. I'm glad to see it went well - hope your brekky was good :)

Susan said...

Wow! You should write books, so descriptive! Glad you made it through these two trying experiences - the dream and the first day of school. It is all downhill now!

Heidi said...

Wowser!!! Quite the dream!

Seriously... it will not be that bad. But I understand. Today, for instance, I was more than glad to keep my younger son home from school when he awoke with the sniffles (even though the two boys together was a huge challenge yesterday) There is something about not wanting to let go... but we gotta!

mackeydoodle said...

It is so hard to let go.
I think I had an anxiety attack on Kennedys first day of school.
It's all going to be O.K. though.....promise.

Remiman said...

Jellyhead,
I'm glad the first step was less daunting than your dream!
Now the adventure begins! ;)
Have fun.
rel

Kerri said...

Perhaps a wee bit protective Momma Jelly, but it sounds like you conquered your separation anxiety in the dream :)
I'm glad Ben's first day turned out well, and that you had a friend to divert your attention.
Just think of the new and exciting world opening up to him! He'll be reading stories to you before too long!

meggie said...

That was a scarey dream. Nice to see you won though.
I hope Ben enjoys his school days.

fifi said...

Oh, I thought you had been at a wildlife park!

I think you had best overbook the surgery today so you dont have time to think about him....

First day back today,
My boy went off through the gates. I watched him rip off his hat and rumple his uncontrollable hair. He looked like he'd slept in the park by the time he was across the playground.

*sigh*

doubleknot said...

You had a classic symbolic dream of losing the little one - I had fears years ago with my little boy going to school but it was the best thing that ever happened to me and him. Hope everything went OK.

TUFFENUF said...

How is Ben's teacher? I doubt if she eats little children, but I would keep an eye on her after that dream!

Puss-in-Boots said...

Oooh aaah...are you concerned or are you concerned???

He'll be okay, Jelly, you know he will...(unless he has a lion of a teacher...of course not!).

Just your subconscious letting off some steam...and I think you realise that.

Good luck, but I bet this last week has been a wonder to Ben.

Stomper Girl said...

Um, just a leetle bit anxious, yes! But you sure showed that lion!

shellyC said...

So will I have the same kind of dream on the 13th of Feb - the day before Luca starts pre-school??

i think you had better tell us some of the other kinds of dreams you have had Jelly!!

John Cowart said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
John Cowart said...

Sharks!
The water is full of sharks.
That's the dream I have about my children.
Ought to be used to it by now; our youngest is almost 30. But I'm still concerned for the children and I still dream of sharks in the water where they swim.

Heidi said...

Are you doing alright? Is he having a good time? I bet he is!!!

Have a good week, Jelly!

Alipurr said...

wow, that was a fierce dream. I am glad you won, you strong womam, you!!!! you are a good mama!