Monday, December 19, 2005


Today, as I do every day, I got up and made myself a jolting cup of coffee. Coffee in hand, I checked all my favourite blogs.

My heart skipped a beat, and I felt sick, when I read the latest post of one of my fellow bloggers. Something very distressing had happened to her, and I could tell from her words how hard it was hitting her. I had tears in my eyes reading her entry.

I went to work feeling strung-out and worried. I wondered how I could explain myself if anyone noticed my mood. I imagined the conversation:

" Jelly, hi, how are you?"

"Um, yeah, OK".

" Just OK... what's up?"

"Well, something terrible has happened to one of my friends - well, to someone I know - well, not that I really KNOW, but just...I've come to know a bit about her, and I've come to care how she is".

(long pause, during which my colleague quietly assesses me)

There was no such conversation, luckily. But I was surprised at my emotional reaction to a faraway blogger's post. Because blogging is just a bit of fun, right? And you don't really ever spend time with the other person, you don't ever really help the other person in any practical way, so how can that be any kind of friendship? How can you build a friendship with someone you never see or touch or hear?

And yet.... I keep checking her blog to see how she is.

Maybe it should have it's own name, Blogfriendship. Not quite real life friendship but not just a 'bit of fun' either.


Heather said...

It is amazing how much we come to care for fellow bloggers, isn't it? I have come to consider that same blogger to which you are referring to be a close friend dspite never having heard her voice. I am so glad she has such nice people caring and thinking about her and her family.

John Cowart said...

You certainly say a lot here.

When my son introduced me to blogging, I had no idea what an impact it would have on my life and what a diverse universe of thought it would expose me to.

I have kept a daily journal for about 20 years so the posting part presents me with no problem, but I think and think and think about making a comment... then I question whether I said the right thing.

I think the only thing comprable to this e-relationship to other bloggers is when I read diaries and journals from former generations: I've actually found myself praying about the problems of people who've been dead for over a hundred years, yet I care deeply about them even today. For me, it works the same way when I read blogs...

Or maybe I'm just a busybody who reads blogs to avoid working.

Heather said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
mackeydoodle said...

I compeletey understand you Jelly.Earlier last month a fellow blogger friend had a bad situation happen within her family & it just broke my heart to feel so helpless. It is strange in a way to feel so close to someone you have never met.

PHOTO said...

There is much caring in the world even though the media would have us believe everyone is bad to the bone.

I agree with John too. I think about what I write sometimes more than what I say in conversation.

I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas.

Val said...

Ronni Bennett in her "Time goes by" blog has posted something to this effect, that there is a connected caring community out there, and it comes right to you on your computer screen.

I'm not saying that it could ever replace human face to face contact, but you can't always have that either. And it's certainly easier to find like-minded people on the internet.

I just stopped by to wish you a happy holiday season, something I can do because blogging makes it possible!

susan said...

Well put, blogfriendship. I feel as if I have a whole new circle of friends since I started blogging. I hope your friend's situation gets better, will be thinking of her.

Anonymous said...

I think Blogfriendship is a great title.