Wednesday, November 02, 2005

a survey

I'm looking for opinions here....please comment.

I've been wondering whether or not to tell my closest friends, or family, how to access my blog. They know I've been writing one. One of my best friends, "Belly", has already asked me how she could locate it, and so has my mother. I've been coy, feeling that if I know people who know me might be reading my blog, I might express myself differently (or even fail to write altogether what I really want to write). I can see the advantages, though, of letting people in my life read the blog. Mum, for a start, lives on a farm 1 1/2 hours from us, and would love to just check in and see photos of her grandkids, with tales of their doings.

I know a few people who read my blog have family &/or friends who read their blogs. In fact I would say most other blogspots that I regularly read seem to have comments from 'real-life' friends, or family members. So what do you think? Do you censor or change what you write, knowing someone you are close to might read it?

10 comments:

Sharon said...

If I had it do over, jellyhead, I would tell absolutely no one about my blog and throw it out there completely anonymously. I have no words to describe the flak I've gotten personally even from what I considered to be the most innocent of statements and/or observations.

I also didn't have the presence of mind to make up an alias, which has gotten me in some trouble.

So I don't write anything about anyone that I wouldn't feel comfortable with telling them to their face, though of course that's a good policy anyway...I've just learned that imagining they'll never see it proves remarkably untrue.

I started out thinking, "I can tell everyone, what will it matter? I never say anything grevious anyway." But I learned. Boy, did I learn.

susan said...

I was wondering if your husband reads this! If you want to keep this one anonymous and make another one for family....

I find that I don't write as open since friends and family are reading it, but I am not too serious anyway, and am having fun with it.

If you think you need a place to vent, and it benefits your peace of mind knowing your family/friends will not read it, then keep it as is. But might they figure out how to access it anyway?

I guess I am not much help, good luck with your decision.

Motherkitty said...

I was totally surprised on Grandparent's Day this fall when my Darling Daughter announced via an e-mail link that she not only had a blog but that she had one since last February. Her announcement gave me the impetus to start my own.

At first I was reluctant to discuss anything of a personal nature fearing, of course, censure, criticism, and flak from those who happened upon my blog. In fact, I didn't tell anyone I had one. Then I thought, so what. That's what blogs are for --to say what you want without speaking directly to anyone. It took me the longest time to even leave any comments on other people's blogs.

I really don't know who is reading my blog because I don't have a counter or a tracking thingie attached to my blog. I only know who is reading by those who leave comments (not too many at this point). I have learned from Darling Daughter that she and Husband read my blog and she communicates more openly with me in this way than she does when we speak. She has expressed a desire for me to tell her more stories of a personal nature and I relish this opportunity.

I agree with Sharon's comment that she wouldn't write anything she would not feel comfortable telling others to their face. I can't imagine what kind of flak she is receiving. I also liked Susan's comment about setting up one blog just for family to pass along pix and doings of the family and kiddies if you feel uncomfortable having family read your posts. But frankly, I don't believe anything you have written is too revealing or personal. In fact, if I was your mother, I would be downright proud of the things you have posted so far. You have revealed a unique aspect of yourself that others in your family might not know existed. Keep up the good work, I say.

Motherkitty said...

I forgot to say, your posts are charming.

Heather said...

I completely agree with Sharon! My family reads my blog and I absolutely censor my writing because of the knowledge that they will read it.

I set up another blog for pictures of the kids, etc. and gave them all that address. It seems to have distracted some of them from my regular blog--which was what I hoped would happen.

I have no problem with my husband and close friends reading my blog, but I really wish my parents and in-laws didn't have the address.

So, my advice? Set up a separate blog for family and friends to catch up on harmless family news and photos.

Sharon said...

What flak I received? You know, it could be something as seemingly innocent as just mentioning someone by name. There are lots of people in my acquaintance who just don't want that kind of free press, no matter how kind. Almost no one gets an identification these days on my site. It's just a lot of third-person descriptors ("my sister", "her husband") -- if at all.

And even then I have to be careful. People say things to me like, "You'd better not put that in your blog," when something noteworthy happens, as if I'm no more than a petty spy. Or maybe there are some trust issues in my particular circle. I couldn't say ;)

mackeydoodle said...

I have never given anyone the link to my blog. Some of the people who read it regularly(like,KSHippychic-DaddyJarBucks-Los-John are friends from a photography site that I belong to & we linked up that way. The other people have just dropped in & stayed:)
My hubby knows about my blog & sometimes checks it out when I am on but has never actually asked for the link. My best friend Keri knows that I have one & she has never asked me for the link either. I, personally,like not having to watch myself because my MIL or something might read it. I say make a blog ofr you family & friends & one just for yourself.

TotalChaos said...

My wife knows I have a Blog, but she does not read it, partly in fact of the language, that gets used sometimes, and she does not check who I blog with. She knows the names of My bloggers, cause I tell some of their stories, but it is my blog to talk about whatever (I) want, and get my frustrations or my Fractal therapy out with.

Alice said...

Two of my daughters have blogs, as does my son's girlfriend. So we all read each other's, but I think we only write things of a fairly general nature and mostly about the things that interest us. My sisters live interstate and I've invited them to access my blog whenever they like, but I don't know how often they do.

I started my blog mainly to interact with other gardeners, although from time to time other subjects may crop up. If I want to correspond either more fully or personally with a particular person, I usually ask if they would mind if I emailed them.

thisisme said...

I know that this is quite an old post, but it covers something I've been thinking about lately. A few people know that I blog, but none of them have asked me for the address. I'm loathe to tell people IRL how to find it, because I suspect that I would need to censor myself. I'm pretty sure that anyone who knows me well would be able to identify me, but I'm just not at the point where I want to tell them how to find me. I explained it to my mum that it was like writing a diary - she understood and hasn't gone looking for me.