Wednesday, January 11, 2006

dreams of escape


I know I am very fortunate .... I do not lack for food, clothing or shelter, I have a supportive if somewhat eccentric family, I have my own family now which is the centre of my life, I have fantastic friends. So no lectures, please, about how ungrateful I am. I know how lucky I am. Truly.

It's just that sometimes the anxiety that my work provokes in me makes me want to go back here (see photo).

I like the fact that the most vital decision I make at the beach is whether to go down to the water, or to go for ice cream. To eat in, or grab fish & chips? To read a novel, or read the paper? Wonderful, lazy, idyllic choices.

Some days I cruise through my working day, feeling that I've been useful, and (mostly) confident with the decisions I've made. Other days, when I've had a few complex patients, and their complex problems have caused me to run late (hence I'm in a flap and everyone's cranky with me), and I'm worried that I've missed something crucial that might cause harm to a patient....those days I want to quit my job and become a check-out chick. That or take an extended holiday at the beach..... about a month could do it. I've had a few of 'those' days lately.

I have to go to work tomorrow. I don't want to. Anyone else feel like coming to the beach with me?

10 comments:

Motherkitty said...

As caring a person as you are, I have no doubt that you are a wonderful physician. I would like to be your patient.

We all have dreams of escaping the hassles of daily life to the seashore, don't we? If we were Rich and Famous, with the ability to go to the seashore whenever we wanted, would we be happier than going occasionally and having daydreams about it? I absolutely loved the snap of your blue-water view. No wonder you want to go back there.

My wish is that you have a hassle-free day with no complicated medical issues to deal with, just simple colds, stomach aches, and the occasional rash.

John Cowart said...

I wish you peace in the midst of even your worst days.

Abandoned in Pasadena said...

We all seem to be day dreaming of going somewhere....I for one would like nothing more than to head out on the open road towards the east coast of the U.S.A. and then on to the west coast and then around home via the Gulf of Mexico.....The weather needs to warm up first to around 80 F. and then I'm ought of here.

Heather said...

Yes, let's go to the beach!

It is obvious you are a great doctor. Otherwise you wouldn't worry so over the complex patients.

You have a heart of gold, Jelly!

mackeydoodle said...

Bathing suit is in the bag!! I'll bring the Pina Coladas!

DayByDay4-2Day said...

As Melissa Etheridge sings:
YOu can sleep while I drive!

jellyhead said...

Thank you so much everyone! I just checked my blog, before getting ready for work, and it was such a comfort to read all your comments.
I'm smiling, and work doesn't seem so daunting now.

Thank you my blogger buddies!

TUFFENUF said...

I hope you have a better day today. Remember - one day you will retire, then you can go to the beach everyday! For now, take a minute, close your eyes, and go there in your mind.

susan said...

I guess the euphoria from your last trip to the beach had to end some time! It lasted a pretty long time, though. Like said before, just close your eyes and fantasize, hear the waves, feel the sand between your toes (preferably do this when you are alone in your office and not with a patient!) Have a great day!

manababies said...

*raises her hand eagerly*

Take me! Me! And I'm sorry but I'll be leaving the baby monitor at home. :P