Tuesday, January 31, 2006

The Great Gender Divide

It's occurred to me over the past few months that my son and daughter like to talk with me about vastly different things. Not just a wee bit dissimilar - vastly different, like I said.

Now maybe others disagree...perhaps they have sons who have many so-called 'feminine' qualities, or their daughters are 'tomboys' who don't fit the stereotypes. I know my kids are not necessarily 'the norm'. Still, I suspect that there will be quite a few other parents who can relate to what I'm saying.

EXAMPLES of questions/statements from my daughter, Laura:

* "Mummy, what if no-one ever wants to marry me?"

* "When I grow up, I want to be .... a Mummy"
("Really?" I say. "Anything else? Because you know, you can be anything you want. And you could be a Mummy as well as something else, if you wanted to."
"No, I just want to be a mummy")

* "Is there a way not to have babies if you don't want to?" (Yes my sweet, it's called don't even think about it until you're 18. Make that 21. Actually, check with me closer to the time)

* "Do you think this skirt looks good with this shirt?"

EXAMPLES from Ben:

* "When I grow up, I'm going to be a space policeman."

* "Imagine if a crane put its' hook in the river....it could catch a REALLY BIG fish!"

* "Why do ladies like babies so much?"

* "I want some pants with pockets. To put my cars in."

Of course there are plenty of topics they are both interested in... lately we've been talking about the Earth rotating, the sun shining on various countries around the world to create day and night, etc. Both boy and girl are discussing it, and trying to comprehend.

But still I marvel at how the dump truck we bought Laura as a toddler has only ever been used by her to transport dolls around, while Ben has played with any of Laura's multitude of dolls...oh, about twice. I used to think that the differences between sexes were all socialised... you know, inflicted (!) on the children by their parents. And then I became a parent, and saw how wrong I'd been.

OK, so I'm not saying anything new here - just that girls are often girly and boys are often boyish. But it intrigues me. And I like it!


Heather said...

I love this post, Jelly. It is too cute.

My sons are all boy, but Bump is a little more in touch with his feminine side than Crash. For example, he loves jewelry and begs me to buy it because it is shiny and he wants to keep it in his treasure chest.

Abandoned in Pasadena said...

As a mother of a boy and two girls all I can say is...it's in the chromosomes.

Boys are boys and girls are girls. They think and look at things differently.
Boys will carry worms, bugs and rocks in their pockets and girls would simply say yuck to that. Girls will take good care of their dolls & stuffed animals while they play with them and a boy will take his stuffed animal and use it for batting practice.

I agree with you...there definately is a difference.

manababies said...

What a cute post. And your kids are definitely squeezable! It is funny how different boys and girls can be without much influence from the parents. Although, my son loves to play with my daughter's dolls. I like to say that they're his girlfriends. :P

mackeydoodle said...

As a Mom of a boy & a girl I can totally relate to this post.
My son is abotu as "boy" as a boy could be.Tougher than nails. My daughter on the other hand can burst into tears if you look at her the wrong way(I can't wait for puberty):P*insert sarcasm here*

Motherkitty said...

Normal as normal can be. (Pity the "poor" mother and father whose children act totally opposite, i.e., boys loving dolls, dress-up, and make-up and girls loving all the manly stuff. Do they push their children to act more "normally"?)

Your kids are so cute and cuddly. Thanks for sharing.

Anonymous said...

That took me back to when my kids were young. They are teens now and don't talk about much these days.

Nope just a mummy... I liked that!

Flossy said...

My girls are very girly and my boy is so much a boy, although growing up in a house full of females has had it's effects. For example he occasionally likes to have his toenails painted and if the girls are doing make overs, he's in there getting make up on! As he's only 9 I'm not that concerned, and actually, I think it's nice that they play together sometimes. Mostly though, they're all outside playing cricket after school!

Alipurr said...

No boys here...all girls, so I don't know. I do know that my girls are very girly, and even my fierce one is fierce about lip gloss and she's not even two!

Kerri said...

I loved reading this post. It evoked so many 'reply' thoughts. I'd love to have a conversation with you about it. Your children sound so sweet.....and you're a great mum! Re the earth revolving..a dear friend who homeschools her granddaughters was recently explaining the difficulty she was having demonstrating with a globe (by walking in a circle around the 'sun', one of said granddaughters) the way the seasons change. For a while it was summer ALL the time ALL over the world. She finally got it right (axis problems:) I don't know if I explained this very well :) Children are such fun to have around. Enjoy them! I know you do :)